#ProjectC61920 Day 12: Mental Resiliency

#ProjectC61920 Day 12: Mental Resiliency

Resiliency is defined as “the power or ability to return to the original form, position, etc., after being bent, compressed, or stretched; elasticity.” This means mental resiliency is the ability to not be shaken (as my oldest daughter loves to recite, ad nauseum) when difficult circumstances would otherwise bend us out of shape. The ability to take a punch makes you last longer in a fight. Likewise, if you’re able to bend (and not break) when an unanticipated situation arises, you’ll find a lot more confidence and a lot less drama in your life.

In order for us to even begin building the house of mental resilience, we must set the foundation (Matt. 7:24-27). We must ask ourselves, “What are my core beliefs?” What is it that you know for sure, no matter what happens, is true and immovable? In order to ask these questions, we must disregard the humanistic futility that is relativism. Relativism says that truth, morality, and even knowledge are subjective, and therefore not absolute. Now before you start telling me that only the Sith deal in absolutes, I put to you that every single human being believes in absolutes. Without absolutes, no society in the world could function. Here’s an excerpt from a book I’ve just recently finished, C. S. Lewis’s Mere Christianity:

But how had I got this idea of just and unjust? A man does not call a line crooked unless he has some idea of a straight line. What was I comparing this universe with when I called it unjust? If the whole show was bad and senseless from A to Z, so to speak, why did I, who was supposed to be part of the show, find myself in such violent reaction against it? A man feels wet when he falls into water, because man is not a water animal: a fish would not feel wet. Of course I could have given up my idea of justice by saying it was nothing but a private idea of my own. But if I did that, then my argument against God collapsed too—for the argument depended on saying that the world was really unjust, not simply that it did not happen to please my private fancies. Thus in the very act of trying to prove that God did not exist—in other words, that the whole of reality was senseless—I found I was forced to assume that one part of reality—namely my idea of justice—was full of sense.

When you really think about it, relativism is a child’s attempt to avoid losing a game by changing the rules, mid-game.

So what are some Christian, Biblical beliefs (a.k.a. doctrines) that we can—and should—hold onto?

What is the Bible?

If you’re going to accept instruction from it, you must acknowledge that the Bible is the inerrant Word of God for our good (2 Timothy 3:16). If you believe that the Bible has even one error in it, then the entire thing becomes subjective and untrustworthy.

Who am I?

Knowing the answer to this question will answer 95% of the philosophical debates that man has ever had. For the entirety of existence, man has grappled with this question. And yet, the question is only difficult (actually impossible) to answer if you remove God’s truth from the equation. The Bible tells us very plainly: We are His creation, made by Him and for Him. We are people with whom God desires a relationship. We are dependent on Him for life and purpose. For a great list to review about some attributes of who we are in Christ, go here.

Who is God?

We must acknowledge that God is the Sovereign Creator of everything (John 1:1-3, 5). He created everything, and everything is His to command, with or without its knowledge or consent. If we do not accept this truth, then we will never be able to move on to anything else. This will define your relationship with God, with your spouse, and with everyone and everything else in the world. As I remember Pastor John Hagee saying, “Either Jesus is Lord of all, or he’s not Lord at all.”

What is the role of the Church?

The Church is the Bride of Christ and just as Eve was made for Adam, we are to further the Kingdom and cause of Christ in the world and the next. The list of commands we are to obey as Christians (and subsequently as the church) is as long as the Bible is thick, but if we boil it down to the primary pillars of the Church, we are to know God and make Him known to the world (1 Corinthians 1:23, Matthew 28:18-20, Acts 2:42). A great resource to read on the role of the Church is The Purpose-Driven Chruch by Rick Warren.

So what do we do with this information? With the previous questions answered, we are able to more boldly go forward in our lives, knowing these things to be true and unshakable because they are based on the truth of the Word.

1.       Commit to the path, even if you don’t know it.

o   God will lead you one day at a time. Pray to Him and ask Him for guidance in both big and small decisions.

o   Document your commitments and review them regularly. When you say you’re going to do something, write it down and get someone to hold you accountable.

2.       Be ready for “trouble” (John 16:33).

o   If you take the path to God, you can be sure it will not be a paved path.

o   Don’t let your being offended force someone to defend themselves. Being resilient means standing strong, but don’t force others to change to save yourself from being bent yourself. Remember, God changes people, not us (Romans 12:18).

o   Be willing to endure persecution and adversity. Satan will send his hordes against you, but remember: People are never our enemy; Satan, our sin nature, and the world system are the real enemy (2 Corinthians 10:3, Ephesians 6:12).

3.       Embrace challenges from time to time; get out of your comfort zone

4.       Recognize the power and role of your emotions.

o   Do not let your emotions ruin your progress. Emotions aren’t evil, but they are powerful and the immature let their emotions sway with every breeze (Ephesians 4:14).

o   Master your emotions; don’t repress them. Seek to align them with God’s truth, then you can revel in them.

Lay a foundation. Stand on it. Invite others onto it.

#walkwithme

#ProjectC61920 Day 11: Spiritual Resilience

#ProjectC61920 Day 11: Spiritual Resilience

As we stated yesterday, resistance is anything that impedes or attempts to prevent movement or progression of something. In our Christian walk, resistance over time is called a trial or tribulation. 

Isn’t it amazing that people find no issue with training with weights and resistances at the gym, but when it comes to our spiritual lives, we balk against any difficulty or form of persecution. But it is in this exact thing which Paul exhorts us to rejoice when he says “And not only this, but we also exult in our tribulations, knowing that tribulation brings about perseverance; and perseverance, proven character; and proven character, hope” (Romans 5:3-4, italics added). Just as iron must strike iron to produce a sharper edge, or as a hammer must impact a piece of steel to make a sword that can withstand many battles, so we must embrace—and even rejoice in—our spiritual blows as we know each instance can strengthen us, if we allow God to work in us through them.

Remember how I said physical resistance differs from spiritual resistance. Well, that’s half true.

Have you ever heard someone day “God never gives you more than you can handle”? This is a misrepresentation of 1 Corinthians 10:13 which says the God will not tempt us beyond what we are able, and will provide a way of escape so that we are able to endure. God will usually allow us to be met with more resistance than we can handle because He wants us to lean on Him, our only hope, for victory. Temptation is somewhat different that resistance. Temptation allows us to doom ourselves, while resistance attempts to cause us to fail by the choice of others. We should not put ourselves in a position which we know we will be tempted to fail. Temptation will come all on its own. No need to help it.

One way we can exercise our own spiritual resistance is to get out of our comfort zone. The most clear way I’ve understood this to occur is when I made (and continue to make) the conscious choice to believe the Bible no matter what it says. It’s hard to accept some things in the Bible. It’s uncomfortable. Our own pride then becomes the resistance that we must strive against. We must deny the personal tendency to allow our own intellect to be the final judge of what is true and what is not. We have to consciously and consistently choose to believe every word of the Bible. I have found this hard with more than a couple of passages. Verses that say a wife should submit to her husband, that we shouldn’t worry (even though it’s so natural right?), or that nothing good or bad we can do can make us more or less saved…these passages are hard to swallow. But I choose to trust in His Word because when I think about it, it has never been wrong. We must all make this decision, or we’ll never move past it.

In summary, remember that resistance builds strength. Resistance over time is a trial/tribulation. Our perspective, as Christians, of trials should be one of relative joy and appreciation, because God has a plan for our growth and character through it. This is not something that comes easily; it takes practice and exercise. And don’t be afraid to get out of your comfort zone and step out in faith on the Word of God and its commands and promises.

#walkwithme 

#projectC61920 Day 10: Physical Resilience

#projectC61920 Day 10: Physical Resilience

The next few days will be about building resiliency. The ability to withstand hardships in our four focal areas. Today, we’ll talk about physical resiliency.

In order to become resilient, we need two things: resistance and time. Resistance is anything that impedes or attempts to prevent movement or progression of something. In physical training, we often use resistance weights to make movements more difficult in order to produce endurance and overall strength increase. These weights, when combined with our choice to strive against them, results in the destruction of the weakest fibers of our muscles. These fibers tear apart under the strain of exercise (this is why we feel sore after a good workout), but they are stronger afterward, once they’ve healed. The next time we use them, those fibers will survive the exercise and the next weakest ones will be torn and rebuilt. Thus the cycle perpetuates. But none of this is possible without resistance. No amount of mental knowledge or emotional direction can strengthen a muscle. Only resistance will produce stronger fibers. Only the rending of the weakest fibers will allow them to become more than they were.

We must also work out the muscles of our body properly. We must ensure that we do not take on more than our strength can handle safely. This is where it differs from our spiritual experience. Spiritual resistance can come in the form of temptation, which is somewhat different from external resistance. But more on that tomorrow.

In order to ensure physical safety, we must focus our exercises on both the muscles that are naturally strong, and those that are not. There is a benefit to working in your strengths, but you cannot allow your weaknesses to be a weak link in the physical chain. Just as an alcoholic should not spend time at a bar, we should not put on so much weight that we break ourselves. We must take it a little at a time. Christianity is not a destination (though there certainly is one!); it is a journey. A journey has many steps and several destinations along the way. We don’t start by benching 300lbs. We start with what we can handle safely (which for me was only 90lbs in the beginning), and we practice. Before I knew it, I was able to bench 105, then 115. It takes time, and there are no shortcuts. You cannot force a flower to bloom before it is ready, or you risk completely destroying the flower. Similarly, you cannot force your body to do what is not capable of doing. Now, I do believe that most human bodies are capable of far more than the mind is aware, but that kind of strain should be done with professional supervision whenever possible. Remember, consider the risk you put on God’s temple when you work out!

Don’t forget to incorporate resistance/strength training in your workouts. Most gyms have both strength and cardio equipment. Take advantage of what you have access to.

One final note. Though we’ve discussed not putting yourself on overload, remember not to cheat yourself. Paul said he buffeted/disciplined his body (allowed it to go through resistance and toughening experiences) and made it his slave (1 Corinthians 9:27). Paul also said he would not be mastered by his body (1 Corinthians 6:12). Be the master of your body. Buffet and discipline your body. You cannot change your flesh nature, you cannot change your genetics, you cannot exchange the temple God gave you. But you can remind it of who is boss.

#walkwithme

#projectC61920 Day 9: Social Exercise

#projectC61920 Day 9: Social Exercise

God created us to be social creatures. You may think you’re content to live along in the mountains with nothing but you, God and the pine trees, but no man is an island. I understand the desire for periodic (or even frequent) solitude. It can do your mind a whole lot of good to limit the social and technological stimulation from time to time. But ultimately, we are going to have to interact with people. God commanded man to be fruitful, multiply, and fill the Earth (Genesis 1:22). The two greatest commandments in all of Scripture even deal with relationships and social behaviors and attitudes (Mark 12:28-31)!

Something I hear from too many Christians today is that they would go to church except their last pastor said something they didn’t like. Someone was mean to them. They didn’t like that the church they attended got into debt (an issue I struggled with for a long time). Someone sat in “their” pew. 

The music was too loud/inconsistent. These are all valid reasons to be irritated. They are not, however, acceptable reasons to give up on the Church. I use two different styles of referencing “the church” when I write.

The “Church” refers to the Bride of Christ, the sanctified Body of believers across time and globe.

The “church” refers to the local community gathering that a Christian attends with regularity.

As I stated, the Church is the Bride of Christ. By refusing to be a part of the local body, you are, by extension, refusing the Bride herself. Now, I know a lot of wives in the world that are, shall we say, less than stellar. I’ve known plenty of wives (and husbands for the record) that infuriate me with how they treat their husbands and other people in general. But I don’t go around insulting other men’s wives—and with good reason. It’s rude and puts me at risk of getting a well-earned punch. How much more do think Christ feels about those who treat and speak of His bride this way. And we all know that the Church has had more than a few blemishes on its record, but Paul reminds us that Christ has a plan for the Church (eph 5:25-26), so we need not worry about trying to even the scales in this life.

The crux is simply this: As Christians, we should go to church because we are commanded to (Heb. 1-:25, Col. 3:16). Additionally, the church is a great place to socialize in a safe place where Christ is revered. If your local church isn’t anything like that, consider visiting a new church. Just like if a school isn’t working out for your child, you often have the opportunity to move them to a better one. As a good friend of mine said, “If you live in the Bible Belt [the South] and you don’t get saved, it’s absolutely your own dang fault because there’s a church on every street corner!”

If you didn’t like your co-workers where you worked, would you throw up your hands and never work another day in your life? Probably not. You’d just find a new or different place to work. The same is true for the schools we put our kids in, so why not the same for church?

If you have children, chances are they’re going to learn social skills quickest from people their age. This is why Christ instituted church, so that Christians could have a community, not just a 3+ person family unit, to learn the Word as well as good social behaviors and norms.

I am grateful that I was raised in a home where church was a major element of our lives. The best friends I’ve ever had in my life, I met in church. I heard the gospel in church. I was baptized and discipled in church. I am who I am because of Christ and His work, largely done in and through people and ministries found at my local church.

Don’t forsake His Bride!

#walkwithme

#projectC61920 Day 8: Mental Exercise

#projectC61920 Day 8: Mental Exercise

While we’re busy renewing our minds through regular Bible study, it’s also important for us to remember to keep our academic minds alert as well. That part of your mind that you engaged in elementary, middle, and/or high school, that you put to the test in college, it needs to be stretched regularly, just like any muscle you work out in a gym. Our brains are a muscle, and we must exercise that muscle.

There are a few ways we can do this. There’s formal education (getting your high school diploma/GED, college classes, undergraduate and graduate degrees, etc.), incidental education (on-the-job training beyond the minimum required for your position, vocational cross-training), and elective education (online or correspondence courses outside a degree plan, technical certification courses, even YouTube videos!). Any or a combination of these things can keep your mind sharp.

But in order to learn, we have to remember to remain teachable. As I’ve grown older, I’ve felt the draw to think that I’ve learned enough to earn some respect. But let’s face it, we don’t know everything (especially when we think we do), and we never will. Everyone and everything can teach us something. So when you’re at your job and you find yourself under the supervision (or employment!) of someone younger than you, don’t let your pride kick into gear. Everyone can teach you something, even if it’s how not to do something. And we have to remember that there’s always something more to learn that will make us better people.

• ·         Noah was 480 years old when God told him to learn to be a carpenter and sailor (when sailing hadn’t even been invented yet) and build the ark (Gen. 6:1-8:13). And after just over 120 years, he sailed in the first boat and it’s not even recorded that he ever did after the flood waters receded.
• ·         Moses was raised under Pharaoh as an Egyptian noble until he was 40, then had to learn to be a shepherd for the next 40 years, after which, he had to learn some serious leadership and desert survival skills to lead the Israelites out of Egypt and across the desert (Acts 7:23-24, Acts 7:30, Exodus 7:3, Numbers 32:13).
• ·         David was a musician for the King (1 Sam. 16:23) and shepherd for his father (1 Sam. 16:11, 17:15). He developed marksmanship skills with a slingshot which allowed him to be a warrior with less than a day’s notice (1 Sam. 17:49-51), and then had to learn to be king later in his life (1 Sam. 6:13, 2 Sam. 2:7)
• ·         Paul was a scholar among the Pharisees (Acts 23:6; 26:5) turned preacher after his conversion (Acts 17:16-34).
• ·         Many of the prophets were not groomed to be prophets, but rather had to gain those skills.

If these people had been unwilling to expand their horizons, many who are now in the “Hall of Faith” would never have been included.

As far as formal, traditional education, I’m not saying you have to be a Rhode Scholar, either. Peter and John were known for being “uneducated” (which really meant not scholarly). But it doesn’t mean they were incapable of learning or didn’t even seek knowledge. There’s nothing wrong with pursuing educational credentials if you have the opportunity. I myself have just signed up to pursue a Master’s degree using the educational benefits I have been blessed with from my time in the Army.

There are also non-traditional forms of self-education that can exercise our minds. I’m a big fan of YouTube tutorials. Many users on there often try to make their lessons quite entertaining in order to garner views. Help them and help yourself! Just don’t get too distracted by all the pure entertainment on those websites! In a society where education is a click away, we should avail ourselves to learn something new every day.

So the challenge for today is:

• 1.       Set a goal for yourself. Whether it’s getting a degree, finishing one, getting certified in a technical field, or being proficiently cross-trained in some vocational skill, set a quantifiable goal and ley out the steps to achieving it.
• 2.       Learn something today. Pick out a topic of some practical skill (growing a garden, cooking, making clothes or furniture, learning the parts and functions of personal computers, learning a language like sign language) and get started. Learn something you can put to use as a hobby or a service. Just learn something new!

Stretch your mind and make it a habit!

#walkwithme

#projectC61920 Day 4: Mental Character

#projectC61920 Day 4: Mental Character

• 
  
  “Be gracious to me, O God, according to Your lovingkindness; According to the greatness of Your compassion blot out my transgressions. Wash me thoroughly from my iniquity and cleanse me from my sin. For I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me. Against You, You only, I have sinned and done what is evil in Your sight, So that You are justified when You speak and blameless when You judge. Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin my mother conceived me. Behold, You desire truth in the innermost being, and in the hidden part You will make me know wisdom. Purify me with hyssop, and I shall be clean; Wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. Make me to hear joy and gladness, Let the bones which You have broken rejoice. Hide Your face from my sins and blot out all my iniquities. Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me away from Your presence and do not take Your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of Your salvation and sustain me with a willing spirit. Then I will teach transgressors Your ways, and sinners will be converted to You. Deliver me from bloodguiltiness, O God, the God of my salvation; Then my tongue will joyfully sing of Your righteousness. O Lord, open my lips, That my mouth may declare Your praise. For You do not delight in sacrifice, otherwise I would give it; You are not pleased with burnt offering. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and a contrite heart, O God, You will not despise. By Your favor do good to Zion; Build the walls of Jerusalem. Then You will delight in righteous sacrifices, In burnt offering and whole burnt offering; Then young bulls will be offered on Your altar.”
  Psalms 51:1-19 NASB
  
  
  This passage has always been a significant one for me. This was the prayer that David prayed after his session with Bathsheba. Many times, I would pray that this would be the state of my heart and mind toward God. While this passage displays an obviously appropriate spiritual posture for us to have, it also represents the correct mental posture that we should have as well, especially in our failures. For me, it is often so easy to focus on the fact that I have failed, to focus on my weaknesses and to embrace that self-loathing that comes from Satan. Satan wants us to hate ourselves, because after all, he hates us. And if he can get our minds into the state where we hate ourselves too, then we will find ourselves not in a state of repentance, but in a self-centered, self-focused mentality. 
  
  
  When I was younger, I struggled for years with deep-seeded depression. I saw myself as a constant failure, within an inability to measure up to others' standards that I had invented for myself. Inside, I took some small subconscious comfort in telling myself that by thinking so little of myself, I was actually being humble. But the reality was that this was just another form of pride masquerading itself as humility. This mental self-punishment did not bring me any closer to God or to other people. On the contrary, it isolated me further, destroying friendships and relationships that I had, and ruining future relationships as well. This was Satan's plan all along: distance me from God and others, fill my mind with lies, and make me feel so weak as if I were incapable of resisting any form of temptation at all, and then walk right in and claim his prize: my soul. 
  
  
  It wasn't until I was 16 years old but I saw the truth of Christ and became a believer in Christ. My eyes were opened to the truth that God knew every flaw I had, had seen every mistake I've ever made, and still, in spite of all that, He still loved me enough to send His only Son to take a punishment for me that I didn't even realize I had earned (Rom. 5:8). So I confessed my sinfulness to the Lord, I repenteded of my sins, and asked Him to come into my heart and forgive me. I thanked Him for what He did to save me. I was baptized about a year later. 
  
  
  Since that time, I've been far from perfect, from time to time. It's not that I've disregarded God's command to be holy (1 Peter 1:15), or that I think that my salvation gives me freedom to sin all I want (Romans 6:1-4), it's that I still battle with my sin nature. And I've failed many times in this struggle.
  
  
  Think of it like this: When a person gets a heart transplant, the condition that was going to kill him is cured. But that person has to take anti-rejection medicine often for the rest of their lives in order to prevent relapses into their previous condition. Christianity is a lot like that. God saves us from eternal consequences of our sin, but we still have to seek Him for the rest of our lives, otherwise, we won't be any more like Christ and it will get to the point where no one would even know that we were a Christian at all. 
  
  
  The Christian walk is, I think, an exercise in training our minds to understand God’s image of who we are. I think that as we draw closer to His image of us, we will both be humbled and honored. We are helpless, ugly, filthy creatures that have stained ourselves with the dye of sin. We are also creatures made in the image of God and that Christ has died a horrible death in order to save.
  
  
  So what do we do to get a correct mental picture? Just like previously stated: get in the Word. 
  
  
  ·      Romans 12:2 = Be transformed by the renewing of your mind.
  ·      Romans 8:6-8 = If you set your mind on the flesh, you are hostile toward God and are not even able to subject yourself to God
  ·      Philippians 4:8 = Think about the right things. Let (or force) your mind to dwell on these things.
  ·      Psalm 119:18 = David asked for his eyes to be opened to the truth of the Word.
  ·      Romans 15:4 = Scripture is good for instruction and encouragement.
  
  
  These are just a few verses, but you get the idea. Fill your mind with truth, and you’ll be able to see who you really are in Christ. Perspective is one of the most important aspects of your mental life. It governs your reality, your goals, and your understanding of your own purpose. Guard your perspective and ensure you're getting it from the Word, and not other people or your own feelings. 
  
  
  #walkwithme

#projectC61920 Day 7: Spiritual Exercise

#projectC61920 Day 7: Spiritual Exercise

When we talk about exercising our spiritual walk, we’re talking about Philippians 2:12 (working out your salvation), James 2:26 (Faith without works is dead), and Matthew 7:19-20 (don’t be fruitless; you’ll be known by the fruit you produce). Simply put, go out and seek to do things in and with your life that enhance and strengthen your spiritual walk.

What are some of these things?

The first spiritual exercise that everyone should definitely include in their lives is spending time in the Word daily. Daily Bible study will not only fill your mind with knowledge, but it will change your mind (Rom. 12:2).

The next step of exercising your spiritual muscles starts where it all started: when you came to know Christ. Thus, the first step is for you to know your personal testimony. Write it down. Memorize it to the point that you can conversationally share it with someone. Know the Scripture passages that support what you’ve experienced (1 John 5:13). Practice sharing it with a fellow Christian that may even be able to role-play witnessing with you (Proverbs 27:17).

Once you know your personal testimony, share your testimony. That’s right, find someone today or this week to share your experience with Christ with (Matt. 28:19). The more you share your story, the easier and less intimidating it will become. Don’t worry if you don’t have a Pauline conversion story. You don’t have to have come from a background of martyring Christians then experience a Damascus Road event where Christ Himself showed up and blinded you in order to convert people. Remember: God changes people, we don’t (Ezekiel 36:26-27). We are only called to be witnesses of what Christ has done in our lives.

These are the basic steps of the Christian walk. Begin here. Make them habits and disciplines.

For advice and strategies on sharing your testimony, research William Fay’s book Share Jesus Without Fear, or the F.A.I.T.H. Evangelism method (just google “FAITH evangelism”). These tools give you Scripture to memorize, testimony articulation assistance, and conversation strategies to develop relationships with people and steer conversations toward evangelistic topics.

#walkwithme

#projectC61920 Day 6: Physical Exercise

#projectC61920 Day 6: Physical Exercise

Today is the second "physical" day on the journey, and it will focus on the two main types of exercises that we should include in our physical growth as a Christian: Cardio and weight training.

I Corinthians 9:26-27

Therefore I run in such a way, as not without aim; I box in such a way, as not beating the air; but I discipline my body and make it my slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified.

Cardiovascular/Aerobic. One of the most common exercises, but many times one of the hardest to implement is running. I hate running. I cannot stand the thought of getting tired going nowhere and running the risk of getting somewhere only to be too tired to run back to where you started. This is why cars were invented. Nevertheless, running has and continues to be a primary gauge of cardiovascular ability and overall health. Now, I have a medical condition in both of my feet that prevents me from being able to run for long distances or periods of time, so I substitute with cycling and elliptical at my gym. I may have to do more time on a machine than pounding the pavement, but it can accomplish the same thing. Other cardio exercises include swimming, walking, dancing, and active sports. Chose one of these and don’t cheat yourself; what you put into it is what you’ll get out of it.

Weight Training. Don’t worry, you don’t have to be an anatomical specimen before you can feel accomplished. It is important to note the benefits of exercising with weights in addition to cardio training. It will make everyday physical tasks easier, and it will strengthen your bones. Alternatives to “free weights” (those intimidating iron barbells and dumbbells that seem to sneer at you just by sitting there) could be resistance bands and weight machines.

Don’t forget to get to get accountability for your work. Get a gym buddy (either spouse or same-gender friend) that won’t slack on you. They don’t have to be Mr. or Mrs. Universe either. In fact, often times, it’s the ones that need the most physical conditioning that will be the most motivated.

Two things about gym attendance:

1.      Don’t be intimidated by the extremely fit people you see at a gym. Chances are, they’ve been going there longer than you. And remember, if you’re sick, you go to a hospital. If you’re out of shape, you go to a gym. Do you ever mock a sick person at a hospital…?

2.      Watch your eyes against lust. Men, if you go to the gym. Keep your eyes where they should go. If it’s too much of a temptation, be a man and stop going. Ladies, keep your eyes the same. And consider your appearance when selecting public workout clothing. Are you helping or hindering your brothers in Christ by how you’re displaying your temple of the Holy Spirit?

A few closing notes on exercise:

·         Don’t let vanity set in (I Tim. 4:8).

·         Do it for the glory of God (I Cor. 10:31).

·         Push through the initial pain and stick with it even when you’re tired (Isa. 40:31).

·         Disciplining your body is a form of worship (Rom. 12:1).

·         Set goals and be master of your body (I Cor. 9:26-27).

#walkwithme

#projectC61920 Day 5: Social Character

#projectC61920 Day 5: Social Character

So what is social character? For our purposes here, social character will be defined as the way we are to conduct our relationships and interactions with all different kinds of people in our lives. This includes family, friends, random people that we meet, and even social networking.

The key thing to remember about any relationship: boundaries.

Yes, every healthy relationship has boundaries. And I do mean every relationship. Friends, family, even your marriage relationship should have boundaries. Now, I'm not necessarily implying that there are things you keep from your spouse, but more that there need to be agreed upon limits of interaction. 

Perhaps I should back up a step and address the most important relationship in anyone's life; that of our relationship with Christ. While there's nothing we can keep from Christ, there is much He can keep from us. This is because while He is called the "friend that sticks closer than a brother", He is also One with the Father, and a father-child relationship is agreeably different that a friend-friend relationship. There's not always time to explain every instruction we give to our children and it's often a good lesson in trust and obedience for the child to simply obey. So just as we "keep things" from our children, we can expect that our limited understanding puts us in a position where obedience is not only crucial, but beneficial.

But what about marital boundaries? Should there be boundaries in a marriage? Well, the short answer (as stated above) is yes. Though it is obvious that those boundaries are more liberal that those we set in other relationships, we must have boundaries nonetheless. Some of these boundaries should include:

1.     Never, never speaking unkindly about your spouse to anyone, ever. Your words are powerful, and the power they have on your spouse is ten times more than that of anyone else. If you’ve spoken unkindly, apologize and commit to never doing it again. Kill that bad habit immediately. One way to do that is to purposefully and proactively speak kindly to your spouse, instead of simply not saying anything at all.

2.     We must not allow others to speak unkindly about our spouses. This can be dealt with by a simple "please don't talk about my husband/wife that way", but if it cannot, the relationship with the one doing the insulting probably just got a new, more restrictive boundary of its own. There’s no friendship you shouldn’t be prepared to lose in order to preserve your marriage relationship.

3.     Secrets. Simple: don’t have them. If it’s anything more than what you’re buying them for their next birthday, be open and forthcoming with your spouse. Is there any reason your spouse really shouldn’t have the passwords to your Email, Facebook, or fantasy football webpage? I personally cannot find a reason. If your spouse is a snoop and always rifling through your Emails or Facebook posts, talk them him/her about it. But do not restrict their access as a means of dealing with that issue.

4.     Changing your spouse. Only God can change people. We can’t even change ourselves, so why would we even try to change someone else? If you believe your spouse has a true character flaw, odds are you’re probably right. But guess what: we all do. Pray sincerely that God would first make you into the person He wants you to be, then pray the same thing for your spouse. Don’t try to recreate your spouse in your own image…that’s God’s job.

5.     Abuse. This should go without saying, but whether it be physical, emotional, mental, or sexual, abuse has absolutely no place in any relationship, but certainly the highest human relationship you’ll ever have. Your spouse needs to trust you with their safety in all these areas. If you are abusive or even manipulative, you are breaking that trust and poisoning your marriage.

This is by no means a complete list, but it is a focal start.

In future Social posts, I’ll cover family, friends, and social networking. For now, let’s prioritize our focus on our marriages. And, if you’re not married yet, begin practicing these disciplines in your dating life, as appropriate.

So let’s resolve together to observe these things over the course of the project. Don’t forget to keep up with your previous commitments as well!

#walkwithme

#projectC61920 Day 3: Spiritual Character

#projectC61920 Day 3: Spiritual Character

Grace and peace!

Today's focus is going to be on setting up spiritual habits that will eventually become our spiritual disciplines, and of course, resulting in aspects of our spiritual character. As with any area of life that we want to develop, we must set up good habits and remain dedicated to those habits in order for them to become easier and more natural.

What would you say if I told you that we already have an accountability partner and a coach in our spiritual walk? Jesus is running this race with us! He already ran the race ahead of us to show us how to do it. Now He runs beside us to encourage us and love us. And in the days to come, He will stand behind us as we lean on him for our only hope for righteousness. It's hard to find such a person in any human on the earth today.

So let's start with some of the more obvious spiritual habits that we can develop:

1. Get in the Word. You can't know truth if you don't hear it or read it. And the only infallible source of that is the Scripture. Listening to a sermon or worship music once or even a few times a week is not enough. You can read all the diet manuals that you want, but if you never actually go on a diet, it won't do you any good. You can all the exercise books you want, but if you don't ever actually do the exercises, you're just wasting time. Go to the source. Eat the meat, drink the milk (1 Cor. 3:2).

2. Meditate on the word. Memorize it. Internalize it. Apply it to your life. It's amazing how you will find the word coming alive in your own life as you observe and remember it. What you fill your mind with is what your life will begin to be filled with. Find verses that provide promises for struggles in your life currently. Find verses the inspire you. These are love letters directly from God to you. Cling to them and own them. Make sure you have someone holding you accountable for the verses that you're memorizing.

3. Pray. Pray. Pray. Prayer is a conversation with God. How can you expect to have a relationship with someone that you never talk to? Be honest with Him. Be real with Him. Tell Him you're honest fears, doubts, struggles, and frustrations. Tell Him when you're happy. Tell Him when you're sad. He'll listen, I promise you. Don't be concerned with using fancy King James version words either. When was the last time you had a conversation with someone that you really trust and love that you talked to in that way? God wants to get to know you, not King James.  Also, keep in mind that no one's prayers are perfect. There's no magical combination of words that you can use that is going to get God to change who He is or what he wants to do, and that's not really why we should pray anyway. Just be open and honest with Him, just like you should be in any other relationship and life.

4. Commit to a daily time in Scripture and prayer. Make a personal commitment. Write it down. Have your accountability partner hold you to your commitments. Set reminders on your phone, calendar, or my personal favorite: sticky notes on your steering wheel. Whatever helps you remember and compels you to stay committed, go with that.

Remember that disciplines come from good habits. Habits come from commitments exercised over time. Stick with it!

#walkwithme 

#projectC61920 Day 2: Physical Character

#projectC61920 Day 2: Physical Character

The first section of this project will deal primarily with creating, sustaining, and developing healthy, Christian physical habits. The over-time result of this will be personal physical disciplines, then eventually physical character traits becoming of a Christian.

You may be asking yourself “what is physical character?” Physical character could be thought of like physical loyalty, or physical integrity. They are things we do physically (or abstain from doing) because of our principles and convictions, whether or not they are already habitual.

Take eating for example: When given the option of eating a sweet snack or a healthy one, we often simultaneously feel an obligation to eat one and avoid the other. Our preexisting eating habits can make this choice easier or harder. If we typically don’t restrain ourselves from eating unhealthy foods, the pull to continue that behavior will be strong. If, on the other hand, we practice habits of self-control, moderation, and a correct perspective of who we are and what our bodies are meant for, we can more easily overcome the moment of temptation. I say more easily, because temptation will always be an element of life, especially when Satan knows exactly what has worked against us in the past.

It is this understanding of who we are and what our bodies are meant for that I want to focus on today. For this, let’s step back to our central verse:

Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own? For you have been bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body. ~I Corinthians 6:19-20

Phrases like “your body is a temple”, “you are not your own”, and “glorify God in your body” should stick out here.

As Christians, we agree with the Bible when it says that our bodies have an identity: a temple. A temple of the Holy Spirit. If the Holy Spirit is in us, then should we not give Him a place to dwell worthy of who He is? Now, if I take this from a worldly perspective and look in the mirror and say to myself “that sure doesn’t look like much of a ‘temple’ to me!” I will only be insulting my Creator. The Scripture does not say “your body could be a temple of the Holy Spirit…if you went to the gym and put down the cookies once in a while…” It says, “your body is a temple.” As a Christian, your body is a temple whether you have made it a welcoming place for Him or not. If we allow ourselves to meditate and absorb this truth and let it manifest in our daily walk, it will make it easier for us to begin changing our behaviors, which will make habits that become disciplines, and so forth.

The passage also says “you are not your own…you have been bought” So really, what we do or don’t do to and with our bodies isn’t really for us to say, is it? This is repeated similarly for married couples in the next chapter in Corinthians:

The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does; and likewise also the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. ~ 1 Corinthians 7:4

Even if we were not purchased through the blood of Christ, we would still have to deal with not being the final say on our own bodies if we’re married. Men, this means you need to ensure that you’re taking care of your body for your wife; think about your heart (the blood pumping muscle, not the metaphorical seat of the emotions): how’s your cholesterol? Do you smoke? Do you do any kind of cardiovascular exercise? Heart disease is a real thing for men especially.

Let’s get real deep, men. Do you keep yourself only for your wife? Do you ensure your members are for her pleasure only, and not even for yourself? Keep Romans 6:13 in mind (yeah, it actually uses the term “members”). Are you keeping your eyes where they should be? Pornography is a drug, and it easily ensnares men into addiction.

Ladies, this can be a delicate topic for you as well. The world system is designed to make you question your validity if you don’t look like the woman on the cover of Cosmopolitan Magazine. But consider this: you only have to concern yourself with being attractive to one man: your husband. Are you keeping your body only for your husband? Are you learning his favorite makeup on you (or lack of)? Are you listening to (or better yet, asking!) what he likes best about your body and thinking of ways you can capitalize or emphasize those things for him? It could be the way you walk, talk, move, or even play together. IF you don’t know, ask. And if you do know, get on it! Just remember that your value as a person cannot come from any person, even your spouse. Know who you are and what your worth by asking God in His Scriptures.

“But what if I’m not married?” you ask… take care of your body for your future husband or wife. Men, create habits now that keep you healthy and able to do the physical things that your future wife may not be able to do (like lift heavy objects and work in a physically demanding vocation). Ensure your health allows you to be around for a good long life in order to take care of your family. Women, remember that modesty is always more attractive. A woman who shows a lot of meat will only attract dogs.  Your milkshake might bring the boys to the yard, but God designed you to bring a man of God home to meet your parents…

Finally, remember to glorify God in your body. This is done by remembering that our bodies are gifts from Him and tools for His purposes. He may have you become a laborer in the field, or go into labor in order to raise Godly children. God’s glory is shown in those who rely on Him for their identity.

Some steps for practical physical character development:

1.       Get a grip on where you stand physically by asking yourself these questions:

·         Am I healthy? Are my weight, physical abilities, and/or physical resilience where they need to be?

·         Do I have any habits (smoking/chemical addictions, overeating, laziness) that are not making my body a welcoming temple for the Holy Spirit?

2.       Come up with a plan to address your issues:

·         WRITE DOWN your goals, and then write down steps to get to those goals.

·         Have a spiritual mentor review and pray with you about those plans.

·         Commit to those plans, and pray for God’s grace to achieve them.

3.       Get accountability

·         Get a gym buddy that won’t let you slack.

·         Sign up for AA (or other addiction recovery group) meetings.

·         Have an online community that will encourage you.

Keep strong in the struggle and fix your eyes on the goal.

#walkwithme

#projectC61920 Day 1: Intro

#projectC61920 Day 1: Intro
So this is day one of #projectC61920. As an introduction, I wanted to overview the four main aspects of the project: physical, spiritual, mental, and social.

First, there's the obvious physical factor of an individual person's health. In the focusing passage, Paul reminds us that our bodies or a temple of the Holy Spirit. This implies that great care and maintenance should be taken and exercised on the physical bodies that God has given us. As with developing and maintaining anything that should last our whole lives, discipline is going to be a major factor. Discipline comes from habits observed over time. Habits become disciplines, disciplines become elements of our character. And just like the military conducts regular, rigorous physical training as a habit, it eventually becomes a personal discipline of most, if not all, service members. Will get into personal physical disciplines very soon.

Second, there is the spiritual aspect of health. As stated before, there will be habits to develop, thus resulting in disciplines and eventually character traits. If you only exercise your muscles, you're only taking care of the physical part of yourself. But when you exercise religious practices, those habits become disciplines, and eventually become part of the person that we are in Christ. Again, more about spiritual disciplines to come.

Third, you may be tempted to think that the mental aspect would simply feed into the spiritual aspect since much of the spiritual aspect involves how we think about God, the Bible, and our own religion in general. Actually, the mental state of a person is not relegated only to spiritual thoughts, but our entire thought process and mental capacity. Consider questions like "I know the Bible is true, but how do I process the truth that it provides?" Consider further, what is the mind of Christ like? We know that the thoughts of the Father are not our thoughts, as his ways are not our ways. We need to be aware of the thought processes that we have, and evaluate them against the truth of Scripture.

Lastly, there is the social aspect of our being. How do we interact with each other? What is the importance of church, friends, family, and other relationships? How are we to conduct ourselves in these relationships? Do we know the difference between a friendship, a marriage, and family? Is there a difference at all? We will begin to answer these and more questions as the days go forward.

In closing, remember that this is a journey. A journey involves a starting place, a path, and destination. Even with a map, we can never really tell exactly what the destination is going to look like, nor the path to get there. There will be missed steps, wrong paths taken, and lessons learned. But there will also be victories, long stretches, and waypoints to be reached and celebrated. So get your Bible, get your water, get your thinking cap, and get your friends and family involved. Because the Christian journey is never meant for one person to figure out alone or with no guidance.

#walkwithme

“Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,”
‭‭Hebrews ‭12:1‬ ‭NASB‬‬

“Therefore I urge you, brethren, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your spiritual service of worship. And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.”
‭‭Romans ‭12:1-2‬ ‭NASB‬‬


Grace and Peace,

Joseph Kilbreth